Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
