i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Randomize
