It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
PANTIES FOUND
Randomize
