I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Randomize