Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
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is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
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I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
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