great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
