1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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