David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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