The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Randomize