There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize