do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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