I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
