I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
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