So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
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