why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
I wish my new phone didn't autocorrect so well. People will never experience the magic of my drunk texts because they think I'm making a coherent statement.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
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