WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
Girls should come with a carfax report
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Randomize