Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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