It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
