"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
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