Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
Randomize