do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
It was confusing and full of hummus
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Randomize
