Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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