your room smells of hookers.
And success
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
