Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
