I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
