do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize