I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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