You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize