it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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