Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
