You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Randomize
