fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Randomize