love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Just made out with a pet sitter. His biz card says "even hamsters". Lowest point in my life.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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