I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Let's get the cat blown out
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
I woke up under a house in Key West
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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