that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
