Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Randomize
