are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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