Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize