I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
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You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
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seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
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