scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
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