why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
