It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
i out mim tonsoeep
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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