Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Randomize
