Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
Randomize
