yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
