Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
im about as happy as oj after his trial
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
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