About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize
