great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
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