I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Randomize
