If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Pooping to opera.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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